Almost forgot: my ass didn’t get to sit on Santa’s lap this ..
Almost forgot: my ass didn’t get to sit on Santa’s lap this year. Mr Golden Pig is on watch.
2020-12-30 20:26:29 +0000 UTC View Post
djsnarklepony posts
*Behind* the scenes at Soapland... See what I did there?? 🍑🍒..
*Behind* the scenes at Soapland... See what I did there?? 🍑🍒🍌
2020-12-29 22:54:25 +0000 UTC View PostCan 2020 please be over now? I wanna wake up in the morning ..
Can 2020 please be over now? I wanna wake up in the morning as if this entire year never happened, with this kind of smile on my face.
2020-12-29 08:46:09 +0000 UTC View PostIf I had a boyfriend I would do nice things for him like was..
If I had a boyfriend I would do nice things for him like wash his clothes from time to time. But actually I would probably just hold onto his dirty ass clothes and wear them when I was sad/bored/horny. Then maybe once they are ripe with my own sweat and cum from furiously masturbating about his excellent communication skills and emotional intelligence I would throw them in the freezer, wrapped in cling film. Then a few days later they would be probably be on their way to someone in my DM’s who had purchased them from me for a specific reason. What if his girlfriend did the same thing? 🧐
2020-12-29 06:06:05 +0000 UTC View PostOMG I LOVE WOOD! BRING IT TO MEEEEE! Merry Christmas 🧡
OMG I LOVE WOOD! BRING IT TO MEEEEE! Merry Christmas 🧡
2020-12-26 05:36:48 +0000 UTC View PostI got you something for Christmas... It’s a boner! I know. I..
I got you something for Christmas... It’s a boner! I know. I shouldn’t have. 😂 What can I say? I’m just the Oprah of boners!
2020-12-24 23:41:13 +0000 UTC View PostOMFG look at this selfie-stick wielding bitch. The knee pads..
OMFG look at this selfie-stick wielding bitch. The knee pads tho... 🤣🤣🤣
2020-12-24 20:58:01 +0000 UTC View PostOMG. Just found out I’m actually on the NAUGHTY LIST this ye..
OMG. Just found out I’m actually on the NAUGHTY LIST this year 😡 When I ask Santa why all he did was show me this picture:
2020-12-23 08:28:18 +0000 UTC View PostWhat to do when the fire dies!!! Bougie bitch life hack: bir..
What to do when the fire dies!!! Bougie bitch life hack: birthday candles can help you start it up again!!
2020-12-22 23:48:55 +0000 UTC View PostThis is my first time having a fireplace of my own and I’m O..
This is my first time having a fireplace of my own and I’m OBSESSED!! Bring me WOOD!!
2020-12-21 19:53:05 +0000 UTC View Post“Alexa, play Justin Bieber’s Christmas album..”
“Alexa, play Justin Bieber’s Christmas album..”
2020-12-20 23:52:43 +0000 UTC View Post
I need help to finish decorating my Christmas tree. There’s ..
I need help to finish decorating my Christmas tree. There’s a bin full of lights and ornaments and I’ve only got two hands on top of being vertically challenged. Actually it would just be nice to have some company while doing it. Debating on doing a livestream with you guys cos I wanna share Xmas stories..
2020-12-18 04:39:33 +0000 UTC View PostI love these glasses lol they are absolutely ridiculous
I love these glasses lol they are absolutely ridiculous
2020-12-17 18:00:33 +0000 UTC View PostMy nipples told me I needed to wear this set they picked out..
My nipples told me I needed to wear this set they picked out for me today and whaddayaknow - it’s like they can see the future. 💯 the right choice. Thanks, nipples!! 😇
2020-12-17 09:54:32 +0000 UTC View Post
Omg I had so much fun tonite...behind the scenes of Death by..
Omg I had so much fun tonite...behind the scenes of Death by Sushi 😂😵😈 Pro-tip: No laughing!! If you laugh the sushi will fall off your belly into the germ and lint-laden surfaces around you. Do you want a piece of lint on your salmon?? Didn’t think so..
2020-12-11 06:24:57 +0000 UTC View PostI’m giving this holiday thing a try...
I’m giving this holiday thing a try...
2020-12-10 10:13:09 +0000 UTC View PostI’ve been masturbating waaay too much lately but hay, 🤷🏻♀️...
I’ve been masturbating waaay too much lately but hay, 🤷🏻♀️. I’m sure yours needs some TLC too.
2020-12-08 01:21:38 +0000 UTC View PostGood morning? Feeling myself in this PJ onesie. I wish this ..
Good morning? Feeling myself in this PJ onesie. I wish this one had an ass flap tho forreal...
2020-12-05 22:04:43 +0000 UTC View PostMmmm...can’t sleep. I have a chronic case of “The Horns” fla..
Mmmm...can’t sleep. I have a chronic case of “The Horns” flaring up at the moment. I don’t understand how — after I had my daily requirement of “vitamin D” earlier in the day, masturbated twice, and watched ~ 3-4hr of Japanese porn — am I still so unapologetically 😈.
2020-12-04 09:56:43 +0000 UTC View Post🔞 #4K #POV #pussy #closeup #toys #dildo #vibrator #self-thru..
🔞 #4K #POV #pussy #closeup #toys #dildo #vibrator #self-thrusting #gadgetgirl #moaning 🔞 “Whisper quiet,” my ass!!! This thing is loud as battery powered cat toy, even when you think the sound would be “muffled.” 😇🤪 This toy is called “Pirouette” from the Le Twirl Collection 🙄🙄🙄 I’m guessing cos it’s a self-thrusting vibrator that not only goes up and down but it goes *around* in an elliptical motion. 😵 It’s also got this “wheel” with tiny soft silicone paddles on it. My clit is waaay to sensitive to take that kind of impact BUT I just turned it around and it’s 💯 for butthole pleasures 😍 This one actually did survive the incident and is in my glass cabinet right now...
2020-12-04 06:44:59 +0000 UTC View PostThis is the only mask am using from now on. Thanks Covid!! ..
This is the only mask am using from now on. Thanks Covid!! 😑
2020-12-02 13:01:05 +0000 UTC View PostYou know you wanna sauna with Miss Soapland 2020. Good morni..
You know you wanna sauna with Miss Soapland 2020. Good morning and good night, my peaches. 🍑 😈
2020-12-01 10:06:34 +0000 UTC View Post
